Ebook Volume 44 Enjoyable Humour for Everyone


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The flight attendant watched a passenger try to stuff his hopelessly overloaded bags into the overhead bin.
Finally, she informed him that she would have to check the over-sized luggage.
“When I fly other airlines,” he said irritably, “I never have this problem!”
She smiled and said, “Sir, when you fly other airlines, I don’t have this problem either.”

A staff, who is able to handle a difficult customer firmly but tactfully in a tricky situation, is one that will be sought after in the service industry.

If you owe $500, you’re a pauper. If you owe $500 thousand, you’re a businessman. If you owe $500 million, you’re a corporation. If you owe $500 billion, you’re the government.

Spending within one’s means is a basic financial principle that is applicable to everyone, from the politicians in the government to the ordinary man in the street.

A minister usually would have his teacher wife proofread the bulletin except for one fateful Sunday when the closing hymn was, “Good Christian Fiends (Friends) Rejoice.”

Such a hilarious mistake is likely to elicit laughter from the audience rather than a sombre censure from them.

An elderly man had become hard-of-hearing and was constantly worried lest the affliction progressed to total deafness.
Seated one day on a park bench, he noted that another man on the same bench was talking rapidly, but he could not hear a sound.
He groaned aloud, “I’m deaf at last! I can see you’ve been talking all along, but I haven’t heard a word.”
But the other just grinned and said, “I haven’t been talking ─ just chewing bubble gum.”

One, who is afflicted with a mind-set of assuming and expecting the worst, will only suffer in needless worry and misery.