Ebook Volume 35 Ticklish Humour for the Young & Old



A woman driver passed a red light and collided with another car.
Jumping out of her car, she snapped at the other driver, “Why don’t you watch where you’re going? You’re the third car I hit this morning!”

The arrogant villain must never be allowed through sheer pretence to get away as the innocent victim.

Angelina was walking through a parking lot when she tripped and fell.
As she was lying there a stranger, Mr Ah Sek, stopped and called out, “Are you injured?”
“No. I’m okay,” Angelina said, touched by his concern.
“Wonderful,” Ah Sek continued. “So will you be vacating your parking spot immediately? I’m waiting to park my car!”

Some show their concern with authenticity, while others do it with a hidden and selfish motive.

Customer: Waiter! What’s this dead fly doing on my meat?
Waiter: I don’t know, ma’am. It must have died after tasting it.

Customer: Waiter! There’s a mosquito in my soup.
Waiter: Don’t worry, sir. Mosquitoes have very small appetites.

While the taste of food matters to most diners, hygiene is of paramount importance and is a non-negotiable.

A man was suffering from depression and was ready to jump off a high bridge when he looked down and saw a little man with no arms dancing all around on the river bank below.
He thought to himself, “Life isn’t so bad after all,” and got off the bridge. He then walked down to the river bank to thank the little man for saving his life.
“Thank you,” he said. “I was going to jump off that bridge and kill myself, but when I saw you dancing even though you have no arms, I changed my mind.”
“I am not dancing,” the armless man replied bitterly. “My butt itches, and I can’t scratch it….”

The humour of it all is that the comedy of a trivial action of one has averted the near tragedy of a precious life.