Ebook Volume 23 Bite-Sized Humour for Busy People
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Bite-Sized Humour for Busy People
Abandon
A woman is a creature that’s expensive when picked up, but explosive when dropped.
Ability
The sort of woman who can make a fool of a man can also make a man out of a fool.
A woman has to be twice as good as a man to go half as far. (Fannie Hurst)
Said an American: “Please notice that the word ‘American’ ends with ‘I can’.”
The ability to speak several languages is an asset, but the ability to keep your mouth shut in one language is priceless.
Absent-mindedness
No man knows what absent-mindedness really is until he finds himself pressing his own telephone number.
The trouble with absent-minded professors is that they are never absent-minded enough to forget to flunk a student.
A professor once spent some time figuring out why professors are absent-minded. He forgot the answer.
Abstinence
Food is like sex: when you abstain, even the worst stuff begins to look good. (Beth McCollister)